Thursday, May 31, 2012

The Gospel According To Manny Pacquiao, The Living Saint That Is Sharon Cuneta

Some three weeks ago a small group claiming to be disciples of the Bible and their church called for the cancellation of Lady Gaga concert. The reason? Lady Gaga is a (or the) devil.

Their basis? Her song, entitled Judas, which they have interpreted literally to mean as a celebration of the infamous biblical character. Lord, please forgive them, English is not their mother language so they really can't grasp the full meaning of it, let alone if it’s in musical form.

About a few weeks prior to that incident, Manny Pacquiao, pound KUNG pound king, received the greatest gift of all- that of divine enlightenment, or so he claims.

He started preaching using almost every opportunity, in almost every venue and at one point succeeded in almost passing as a biblical scholar except that his indiscretions were just too fresh to be forgotten. And no, Krista Ranillo and Ara Mina and countless nameless women wouldn’t want to be written down in history books as the modern incarnation of Mary Magdalene.

Let's go outside the Philippines, President Obama recently expressed support for gay marriage. He is lucky to have been in the right country at the right time. Had he been in the Philippines he would have automatically clinched the monicker ‘Satan’! So, yes, it’s amazing how geographical location can spell the difference between heaven and hell.

Consequently, in the 2010 Philippine Presidential Elections- the portrait of good versus evil has been heavily used (abused?) and as many historians would put it- the good (PNOY) triumphed versus the evil (GMA).

I would have conceded to this categorical claim except for one thing: the devil’s cronies in the congress are now the same allies of PNOY. So if a devil becomes friend with an angel (?) the devil becomes holy?

Meanwhile, The Vatican should acknowledge the contribution of twitter to the spreading of the word of God. Because of twitter, quoting a bible passage has been the hobby of major celebrities in the country.

If twitting a bible verse is a requirement for sainthood then Sharon Cuneta might be the strongest candidate to be ordained by the church as a ‘living saint’.

The Vatican is contemplating if she is rightful to the title: The Patron Saint of Palengke.

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